


Connect

by SpecialHell



Series: Stucky AU series with Random Verbs for Titles [4]
Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Angst, Coney Island, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, First Date, First Kiss, Full Content Warnings in Notes, M/M, mentions of past trauma
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-03
Updated: 2019-03-03
Packaged: 2019-11-08 17:52:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 3,193
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17985860
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SpecialHell/pseuds/SpecialHell
Summary: Bucky and Steve have their first date, and talk about their pasts.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Despite some of the scary tags, I promise this story is heading towards a happy ending! 
> 
> I'm putting the specific Content Warnings for each chapter in the notes, so there are no nasty surprises.
> 
> This first chapter is warning free.

Bucky giggled as he left his apartment building and saw Steve sitting on his bike outside.

“I had to drop off a CD to Sam,” Steve’s demeanour was shy as he explained. “Thought maybe I’d offer you that ride?”

Bucky struggled not to bite his lip at the vision Steve presented - leaning back on his sleek motorbike, in his leather jacket, with his hair ruffled from the helmet.  
“I have a confession.”

“Oh?” 

“That night…” Bucky stepped closer to the bike as he spoke. “I was so tempted to say yes. Just hop on the back of your bike, and let you drive me anywhere.” Bucky was looking up at Steve through his lashes, bashful. Steve almost forgot how to breathe.

“As much as I would have loved that,” he eventually managed to say. “You were smart to turn me down. I could’ve been anyone.”

“Well you’re not just anyone now,” Bucky smiled, straightening up and closing the gap between him and Steve. “Got a spare helmet?”

Steve was grinning as he turned in his seat and produced a helmet for Bucky from the saddle box. Bucky took the helmet, but didn’t put it on right away.

“Since we’ve got wheels, you wanna see where I work? It’s closed right now, but I can show you the building.”

“I’d love that,” Steve was still smiling. Bucky hid his own grin by putting on the helmet and straddling the bike. He wrapped his arms around Steve, as the engine revved and they pulled away.

   
  


Steve killed the engine and took off his helmet. They were stopped across the street from a fairly unassuming building. If it wasn’t for the neon sign above the door, reading _‘Soldat’_ , Steve would have assumed it was a warehouse. 

“This place is a cabaret?” Steve asked, trying to keep the disbelief out of his voice.

“Yep,” Bucky had also removed his helmet, but he hadn’t dismounted the bike. Steve wasn’t complaining. “Opens at Five, closes at Three.”

“No offence,” Steve turned his body to face Bucky as best he could without getting up. “But you don’t really seem like the ‘intimidating doorman’ type.”

Bucky’s laugh was rich and genuine at Steve’s observation.

“We don’t get a lot of troublemakers,” he explained. “My size, plus the metal arm, usually scares off anyone who comes around making assumptions about the business.”

“Fair,” Steve conceded. He wasn’t ready to push on the issue of the arm.

“Besides,” Bucky’s eyes were laughing as he crinkled his brow into the most adorable scowl Steve had ever seen. “I can be scary when I want to be.”

Steve gave a nervous laugh and turned back to face the handlebars. He was terrified, all right, but for a completely different reason.


	2. Chapter 2

The weather and traffic were on their side, and soon Steve was falling into step with Bucky after locking up his bike.

“I think we should get ice-cream,” Steve suggested as soon as they were close enough to speak. “Somewhere we can sit down.”

Bucky didn’t reply, instead draped his right arm across Steve’s shoulders and steered him towards a small cabin-style diner.

They found a booth near the back, and Steve slipped in one side before shrugging off his jacket. Bucky sat opposite, and looked uncertain for a moment.

“Do you mind?” He asked, voice quiet as he indicated towards his own jacket.

“Of course not, why would I?” Steve replied, carefully suppressing the inappropriate string of words that came to mind about biceps and forearms.

“Some people get uncomfortable,” Bucky explained. His voice was even while his eyes projected sadness. “Y’know, about the arm?”

Steve took a second to breathe through the sudden anger that flared at the thought of someone - anyone - making Bucky feel inferior because of his prosthetic. Bucky was peeling off his out layer while Steve calmed himself. The gentle ‘tink’ of his wrist on the table pulled Steve’s attention back to Bucky.

“I, um,” Steve gestured helplessly towards the arm. He wanted to show Bucky that it was ok, but he was afraid of being too forward. “Can I?”

Bucky looked blank for a short moment, before he understood what Steve was asking. He blushed. “Uh, yeah. Sure.”

Bucky extended his left arm, palm up, to allow Steve a better look. Steve didn’t touch, but he was fascinated by the intricate plates. It took a minute to realise why the patterns looked so familiar.

“This is Stark tech.”

Bucky curled his hand up at the unexpected outburst, and Steve’s eyes darted up to his face.

“Yeah. How’d you know?”

“I’ve seen it before,” Steve was smiling, but the confusion on Bucky’s face made him nervous. “A prototype. Not on another person, I mean.”

“You’ve… been inside Stark Industries?” Bucky sounded like he was trying to piece it together, and it hit Steve that they hadn’t talked about this at all.

“Oh. Yeah. I know Tony. Sorry, I don’t think I’ve ever mentioned that.”

“Tony?” Bucky still looked dumbfounded. “Tony Stark?”

“Yeah,” Steve tucked his own hands down into his lap. “Guess he’s another one who’ll be kicking himself that he didn’t set us up sooner.”

“I’ve never met him,” Bucky said, his body language relaxing a fraction. “How do you know each other?”

“I…” Steve started to blush, and Bucky laughed. The sound startled Steve, but he was happy to see Bucky smile.

“You either fucked him, or you saved his life.”

Steve’s blush spread further as he murmured. “Why would you say that?”

“Because you only seem to get embarrassed when someone is saying nice things about you,” Bucky’s smile was crooked and fond. “Or when they start talking about your love life.”

“Alright,” Steve sighed, looking Bucky in the eye. “I maybe… kind of… stopped him from bleeding to death once.”

“Kind of?” Bucky prompted.

“Well, I was walking by Stark Tower just as someone was… stabbing him? It was a total coincidence, and I’m sure somebody else would have helped if I wasn’t there.”

“But nobody else did,” Bucky pushed. “You did. You saved his life.”

Steve gave a shrug and pulled a menu towards himself. Bucky allowed the distraction; knowing Steve was getting shy.

“Joke’s on me,” Steve said next. “After he recovered, Tony decided we were friends. Mostly that means getting calls at 3am when he’s had a brilliant idea, dealing with him interfering with my personal life, and the occasional black tie gala.”

“Well they do say that if you save someone’s life, you become responsible for it. Seems a fair trade to have to deal with going to parties, rather than pulling him out of jail every week, or having him fall in love with you.”

Steve snorted at that comment, and Bucky laughed aloud at the sound.

“I’ll have to introduce you,” Steve was looking at Bucky now, and smiled. “You might change your mind.”

“You could always come to my next calibration appointment,” Bucky offered. “Stark is never there, but I know he’s in the building.”

“I’d like that,” Steve smiled.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> CONTENT WARNING: This chapter deals with how Bucky lost his arm. The descriptions aren't graphic, but there is heavily implied hate crime/homophobia.

They ordered their ice-cream, and Steve tried to keep a lid on his curiosity. He didn’t want to push Bucky but Sam’s slip-up about the bar, coupled with Bucky’s insinuation that they both had baggage, was making him anxious to know everything about the man sitting across from him.

“You can ask,” Bucky’s voice broke into Steve’s thoughts, and he was momentarily ashamed that he’d been caught staring.

“I don’t want to pry,” Steve said softly, swirling his spoon through the remains of his ice-cream.

“You won’t be,” Bucky assured. “Whenever you’re ready, I’m ok to talk about it.”

Steve swallowed around the lump in his throat and took a breath.

“Sam said… He didn’t mean to, it was an accident. He said that you coming up to me in the bar was a big step for you.”

“It was,” Bucky was wearing that crooked smile again. “Good thing you have such a trustworthy face.”

Steve smiled at the compliment, but it didn’t dispel the apprehensive feeling in his chest. “Did you… Did someone hurt you?”

“Yeah.” The admission was expelled on a heavy breath, and Steve wished he hadn’t asked at all. He was about to apologise when Bucky began to speak again.  
“My sister lives upstate. Just over a year ago, I went up to visit her. She’d just had a baby, so after we’d had dinner and caught up, I excused myself while she got the baby to bed and everything. There was a bar close by, so I went in for a drink. It wasn’t too busy, and it seemed friendly enough.”  
Bucky took another deep breath, and Steve was torn between supporting Bucky as he talked through it, and hushing him up with hugs and words of comfort. He didn’t want to hear what was coming, but he knew he had to listen.  
“I was drinking my beer, and this guy at the bar keeps looking at me. I was in a good mood, and he didn’t seem to be with anyone, so I figured I’d give it a shot. I went up to him, offered to buy a drink. He says he’s not into that. I say sure. No harm done. I go back to my table and finish my beer. The guy leaves, and about ten minutes after so do I.”

Steve saw the tremor in Bucky’s right hand as it rested on the table, and slid his own into it. He didn’t know what to say, but he could at least do this.

“My sister’s house wasn’t far, so I was getting ready to walk back, when this guy shows up again. Except this time, he’s got three friends with him. The specifics are a little blurry, even now, but you can probably guess the kind of things they were saying about my… Anyway, they beat on me a little, and left me lying on the ground. It wasn’t all that bad. I figured I had a busted nose, maybe a cracked rib… but then…” Bucky’s hand tightened on Steve’s, and Steve brought his right hand up to hold onto Bucky’s left. “The guys with him, they’d come in a pickup. Big, heavy thing, and… I could hear them saying something and laughing. They got in the truck, and I thought they were going to leave, but they didn’t. They back the truck up… over my arm… and then forward again. It was…” Bucky took a deep, shaky breath. “It was because my left hand is the one I touched his shoulder with at the bar, when I thought he was interested in me.” 

Steve’s knuckles were white with the grip he had on Bucky’s hands. Bucky was holding back tears, and Steve had never felt so much anger towards someone he’d never met.

Bucky got himself together quicker that Steve did, and the sound of Bucky’s voice pulled Steve’s attention back to that open, beautiful expression he always seemed to be wearing when they were together. 

“You’re looking a little stabby there, pal.”

Steve forced himself to loosen the grip on Bucky’s hands and took a deep breath. “Sorry,” his voice was shaking, but he tried to smile. “I just… you’re so kind, and good, and the thought of someone…” Steve took another breath and tried to focus on the Bucky in front of him - safe and well, and smiling like Steve’s desire to burn the world down for him was _cute_.

“It could’ve been worse,” Bucky shrugged. “None of my bones punctured the artery, so I didn’t bleed to death.”

“I’m glad,” Steve replied, taking Bucky’s hand again, more gently this time. “And I’m glad you felt safe to come to me at the bar.”

Bucky’s hand curled around Steve’s.

“Me too.”


	4. Chapter 4

“So have you ever tried to set Sam up?” Bucky was lining up a shot at the sideshow as he asked. Steve watched with fascination as he knocked down target after target. “He doesn’t like to talk about his own life, I’ve noticed.”

“I did try once. It wasn’t a disaster, but they’re just friends now.”

“No chemistry?”

“Do you know,” Steve tried to tread lightly. “About Riley?”

“Sam’s ex-boyfriend, right?” Bucky clarified as the last target fell.

“Yeah. Sam’s only boyfriend. They were together all through college. It turns out that Sam isn’t really attracted to guys. He was only attracted to Riley. Luckily, Rhodey - the guy I set him up with - was understanding.”

“I’ve wondered… about Sam and Nat,” Bucky ventured. Steve laughed.

“I don’t think anyone will ever figure that one out. They keep their business to themselves, and I sure as hell won’t be asking!”

“Good call,” Bucky smiled at the sideshow attendant, who handed him the prize he’d just won. It was a large stuffed racoon toy, and it was holding a plush machine gun. Steve’s face crinkled in amusement, and Bucky pressed the toy into his hands.

Steve was going to protest for about a second, but the look in Bucky’s eyes instead made him blush and press the toy to his face. They walked along the boardwalk for a while in comfortable silence. Steve noticed a young girl and her mother approaching. The mother was on her phone, clearly stressed out, and the little girl was holding onto her hand. The girl looked up at Steve’s raccoon with wide eyes and, without even thinking about it, Steve handed the toy to her. She made a small, delighted squeaking noise, which drew her mother’s attention. She looked from the two men, down to her daughter who was squeezing the raccoon in obvious delight. Steve was worried for a second that he’d done the wrong thing, but the fond look that came over the mother’s face convinced him otherwise. The two carried on, and Steve only stopped watching them when the feel of eyes on him became too much. Looking up through his lashes, Steve turned to Bucky. The look on his face took Steve’s breath away.

“How on Earth has nobody married you yet?”

Steve’s smile faltered, and Bucky picked up on it right away. Wrapping an arm around Steve’s shoulders, Bucky changed the subject.

“You wanna ride The Cyclone?”

“You want me to throw up on you?”

Bucky laughed, but one look down at Steve showed that they wouldn’t be moving on from the conversation Bucky had accidentally opened up.

“Let’s go up on the Wonder Wheel,” Steve said. “It’ll be quiet and we can talk.”

“Ok.” Bucky moved his arm from across Steve’s shoulders and instead offered his hand. Steve took it with a grateful smile, and they headed out towards the wheel.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Content Warnings: Discussion of losing loved ones in the military/ background character death.

They were at the quarter rotation when Steve began to speak. He was still holding Bucky’s hand, but he was looking at the floor.

“I was close to proposing once. Almost three years ago. I was in a relationship with the most amazing woman. Peggy. She was an Air Force pilot. The smartest, quickest, most wicked woman I’ve ever  known; and that includes Natasha. She was a whirlwind. Whenever she had leave, she would come bursting into my world - she liked to say how cute I looked with my feather ruffled.” Steve gave a sad little laugh, and Bucky tightened his grip.  
“I loved her, and she always reminded me that I was loved too. I bought a ring, right before she was due to come home. I was going to marry her. Move onto a base, be a military wife. The whole deal. But the night before she was meant to leave, I got a call. Her wingmate, Carol. She told me that Peggy had… Peggy crashed during a test flight. There was nothing anyone could do.” 

By the time Steve had finished speaking, they were at the top of the wheel. Steve took a deep breath, and risked a look at Bucky. All he saw there was concern, and affection. None of the pity he’d been afraid of. Bucky gave a small, wobbly smile, and Steve returned it before looking out of their pod over the city. Bucky shifted closer, putting his arm around Steve again, and together they enjoyed the silence.

 

 

After the wheel they ate corndogs and wandered around. They went on a few smaller rides, and Steve watched in awe as Bucky beat more of the sideshow games. Each time they slipped away before the attendant could give them a prize - Bucky was just happy to impress Steve, and Steve was gleeful watching Bucky’s show of skill. 

It wasn’t long before there were no more excuses to stay. The sun was getting low in the sky, and the breeze took on a chill. Bucky suggested a small, out of the way restaurant for dinner, and they enjoyed soft lighting and easy conversation. The heavy topics of earlier in the day had left them both incapable of discussing anything more serious than their favourite books and movies.

The night ended with Steve driving Bucky home. Steve wasn’t sure if he imagined that Bucky was holding onto him tighter than was necessary, but he wasn’t going to bring it up. They dismounted at Bucky’s apartment building, and Steve walked with him to the main entrance.

“I had a really great time,” Steve smiled, but he was still a little nervous. “I’m glad we did this.”

“Same here,” Bucky replied, before taking a deep breath and stepping closer to Steve. “I’m going to kiss you; is that alright?”

Steve’s timid smile morphed into a happy grin as he nodded. Bucky smiled in response before closing the gap and pressing his lips to Steve’s.

It wasn’t like a sappy romance novel. Fireworks didn’t go off behind Steve’s eyelids. Instead, a quiet calm settled inside him. He pressed closer and wrapped his arms around Bucky, who was only too happy to return the gesture. Steve felt like he could stay in that moment for the rest of his life. Eventually they had to separate, and the look of utter contentment on Steve’s face made Bucky’s heart soar.

“Goodnight,” Bucky whispered.

“’Night,” Steve replied, still floating. “I’ll see you soon.”

“Definitely.”

Steve reluctantly stepped away, and Bucky opened the door. Steve descended the steps, and watched from his bike as Bucky disappeared inside. He was distracted from staring blankly at the closed door by the sound of his phone chiming.

 

**Sam:** _When you two have babies I expect one to be named after me ;-)_

 

Steve barked out a laugh, and looked up to see Sam and Nat, waving at him from their third-floor window.

 

 **Steve:** _I’ll talk to you tomorrow. Night x_

 

**Sam:** _Goodnight, Loverboy ~ Nat x_

 

**Sam:** _I’m not working tomorrow. I expect details ~ Sam_

 

Steve laughed and shook his head before putting away his phone and heading home. His mind was running with all the things he wanted to do next with Bucky. A museum, a long ride out to the lakes, maybe a nice evening in: cooking together. The possibilities were endless, and for the first time in a while, Steve truly felt that letting someone in was not only doable, it was _right_.


End file.
